Hyperventalations

I can't think. I can't breathe.
Where is up, where is down,
why aren't my feet secured?
why is my head not above water?
where is this?

I need structure, I need love.
Neither are present, or have been for awhile.
I'm trudging a long with nothing.
I need something. I can't voice it.
A home is needed, a base is needed.

Do I need a family for a home?
Will I have a family? Do I want one?
I have no idea.
This idea of self is one i'm not familiar with.
I need myself before I can have anyone else.
I'm drifting.
I should get out.
I need to get out.
I have to get out.
ITS TIME TO GET OUT.

I need to breath.